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Letter to sunari

To my little virtuous woman,

In all my 24 years of living, no moment tops the one when you were born. When mama sat me down to tell me that she was pregnant with you, I was ecstatic. My prayers had been answered. 

I finally had a sister. After living around my brothers and boy cousins, I just wanted someone that would understand me from a feminine perspective. I wanted and craved sisterhood. 

I remember the day mama went into labor. Before she dropped me off with grandma, she had pulled up to the Popeyes to get her some chicken because she wasn’t set on that hospital food. The lady at the window was freaking out, “You’re In labor?!” I thought that was the funniest thing. I hated that I couldn’t come to the hospital, cause I wanted to be there every step of the way. I mean, shouldn’t I have been? After all, I prayed for you. And technically, that made you my baby. 

When I arrived at the hospital to see you, I was in shock. You were real. A little dark eyed, beautiful baby that I could finally call my sister. I was so taken aback and in awe that I think I didn’t move for a minute. 

As you grew up, I loved your personality. You didn’t really like anyone but you liked me, and I loved that. You mean mugged camera men. You didn’t want anyone to hold you. You didn’t want to do your pre-k homework because you already knew how to write your name. And you viciously bit people. Now, I wasn’t to happy about that last part because sometimes I was the victim of your attacks. But, I guess it was all worth it. Lol.

I was always so proud to be a big sister, and I still am. It meant a lot to me how you could be so young but so loving. I remember when I was crying in my room when I was in high school and how you stopped what you were doing, sat with me, and hugged me. In your cute little tiny voice, you told me it was going to be okay. I was very grateful for that. 

As I watch you blossom into your own little woman, I admire how logical and wise you are too. At such a young age, you need things to make sense. And when they don’t, you aren’t going for it. Go, you. 

I’ve always hoped that I could be a sister that you were proud of and that you could rely on. I’ve always wanted to be that Big Sis that had your back no matter what, and that you were comfortable with sharing your secrets with. I wanted to be a good role model for you and make sure that you were set up to succeed spiritually, mentally, and financially. 

I think it’s important that you know that you have been my driving force to keep going and striving to be a greater sister, woman, and person when I was ready to give up. When my world was crashing down, I thought of you and it revived me. And I thank you for that. 

I want you to know that I support you, and love you. I will always be here for you, From the beginning until the end. For the big and the small things. From the wind to losses. From broke to rich. From the laughs to the tears. From the first crush to the husband. From girl to woman. From Aunty to mother. From birth to grave. And from everything in between. 

You’re artistic, smart, funny, weird, and lacking rhythm but gracefully beautiful. You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and I’m always here to support you. 

I am so blessed to be your sister. And know, I will always be here if you need me, and even if you don’t. 

With love,
Your Big S


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